Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Speculation on Ken Rice's Fingernails

PITTSBURGH. One of the unfortunate things about being an anchor on the local news is that there has to be a newscast every night whether there is news or not. If you know Ken Rice personally, please let me know if he has fingernails or not, because there are some nights when I can feel him sitting behind the desk pulling them out one by one for amusement.

Let me paraphrase the 1st 10 minutes of the KDKA 10 PM news on UPN 19. Man stands in a parking lot in Cranberry talking about snow that didn't stick and the impact that this is having on our holiday travel (none last night). You might be surprised to know that people buy rock salt to melt things snow off the sidewalk (some as much as 80lbs! hopefully enough to last the winter -- after last night, they've still got 80lbs. I hope we'll check in on those people again soon.), and that cities and counties purchase a lot of salt in advance in case it snows (which it didn't last night, but if it had it might have been a genuine snow event they were covering, which it wasn't).
Since we're already in a gas station parking lot and there's no snow, why don't we report about the price of gas too! A riveting interview from a man passing through from Florida and proceeds to recall the price of gas in every state between here and there...In Florida it's $2.24, in Georgia it was $2.19, wow, in PA it's only $1.99."

Look...there goes Ken Rice's pinky nail...that had to hurt. Maybe I can buy it on e-bay.

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